12 years ago today, I boarded a plane to Canada with my life packed into two suitcases.
I had visited Canada before, but this time was different. I wasn’t coming for a season or a visit. I was arriving as a permanent resident, stepping into a life that was no longer temporary.
I left behind the streets that knew me, the warmth of São Paulo, the colour, the music, the language, and the people who had shaped me. Everything familiar stayed behind while I followed my heart across the world.
There is something poetic about that journey happening on June 12th — Brazilian Valentine’s Day.
Since then, June 12th has carried many meanings for me.
It’s the day I officially began my life in Canada. The day I came home to the most incredible partner and started building a future together. The day I chose to begin again.
It’s also a day of missing. Of craving the smiles, laughter, and presence of people I don’t get to see enough. Of missing the smells, the food, the music, and the culture that shaped me. A reminder that when you build a life somewhere new, a piece of your heart will always remain somewhere else.
So much has changed since that choice.
Toronto eventually led us north. We embraced snowy winters, the quiet changing of the seasons, and the beauty of Northern Ontario. We welcomed a smart, funny, and beautiful daughter into our lives. We found community, purpose, and belonging.
Slowly, home stopped being somewhere I was trying to get to and became something we were creating together.
I became an entrepreneur through Complexly Simple and found the confidence to share my writing through Productiverse. I discovered new passions, new dreams, and new versions of myself.
And yet, that version of me from 12 years ago never disappeared. The places I’ve lived, the people I’ve loved, and the experiences that shaped me all continue to travel with me.
Looking back, I realize something important.
On June 12, 2014, I thought I was coming home to Toronto. But home isn’t a place.
Home is the feeling of being safe enough to grow. It’s the people who stand beside you. It’s the life you build, one choice at a time. It’s knowing that wherever the road leads next, you have a place to return to.
Twelve years later, I’m grateful for the courage it took to leave, and even more grateful for everything I found. For the people that made Canada feel like home, and for the people that keep my Brazilian home present in my life.
Home, it turns out, was waiting for me all along.
Written by Marcela Killin. If this landed somewhere, I'd genuinely like to hear about it — write to me.